Agent Kelm - Season One: Cake Printer

Agent Kelm - Season One: Cake Printer

RandyWritesProcedurally

Episodes 16
Avg. Duration 5m
Activity Dormant
Since Oct 2025
Latest Episode Nov 2025

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Publishing Details

Schedule
Daily
Format
Episodic
Consistency
20%
Hosting
anchor.fm

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About This Podcast

🕗 New transmissions every weekday. A black–and-white micro–noir about the EchoCorp afterlife economy. Agent Kelm doesn’t kill people—he resets them. When grief gets productized and the dead “buffer,” customer service becomes sacred, petty, and very, very funny. Shot in strict monochrome with moody softbox lighting, this tale walks through corridors, cubicles, and living rooms where EchoBoxes hum like mini-fridges of memory—until it all ends with CTRL • ALT • DEL. This story is written and narrated by RandyWritesProcedurally, the same author who is publishing Agent Kelm on Royal Road: https://www.royalroad.com/profile/837521/fictions

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Recent Episodes

S1E16 Agent Kelm - S1E16: Welcome to Immortality

Nov 08, 2025 7m

There’s a moment between the drips and the drop. You don’t land, you get lowered, like defective meat into a diagnostic centrifuge. My first trip into an EchoBox? No. That was 147 sequences ago.…

S1E15 Agent Kelm - S1E15: Dead Drop

Oct 27, 2025 5m

Redline Complex isn’t red. It’s concrete, beige, and always twenty percent too humid. The name refers to the psychological stress index of its average occupant, not the decor. My unit—B3—was marketed…

S1E14 Agent Kelm - S1E14: Bread and Butter

Oct 22, 2025 5m

Agent Kelm. Season one. Cake printer. – Episode 14: bread and butter There it was. Another job ticket blinking like a polite threat. EchoCall Dispatch had flagged it Category One: Looper. Low drift.…

S1E13 Agent Kelm - S1E13: Grief Appliance

Oct 21, 2025 5m

Agent Kelm season one. Cake printer. – Episode 13: grief appliance . Aunt Karen. The original. Shows up in every box, like background radiation. She’s always helpful. Always maternal. Always in the…

S1E13 Agent Kelm - S1E12: Protocol

Oct 21, 2025 4m

Disconnect Specialist Agent Archibald Kelm enters dying minds when families want closure. The final kind.Nine drips. Nine lies. A helmet that clamps on like a reminder. He loads into the EchoBox—a…

S1E11 Agent Kelm - S1E11: Decay Edge

Oct 20, 2025 6m

In a world where death is just another subscription service, Agent Kelm maintains the impossible boundary between memory and madness.Welcome to the EchoBox era: your dead relatives live in sleek…

S1E10 Agent Kelm - S1E10: Normal

Oct 17, 2025 4m

You’ve got a smart fridge, a smart couch, and four heads in the closet. Welcome to modern grief.EchoBoxes are standard now. Like toasters. Or diabetes 3. Shelf life: indefinite. Emotional return:…

S1E9 Agent Kelm - S1E09: The Call

Oct 17, 2025 6m

EchoCall: talking to a floating head in a nutrient coffin, cheaper than therapy.Three engagement modes. Casual: quick check-ins while microZapping dinner. Nod at dead uncle’s football story, close…

S1E8 Agent Kelm - S1E08: Echo Dreams

Oct 17, 2025 6m

Kelm’s been to places nightmares wouldn’t go. In the Echo field, they’re called Sequences—dream realms, thought-space death spas. Every half-dead head in a gel-box spins out its own universe, coded…

S1E7 Agent Kelm - S1E07: TNB for Life. Short Life

Oct 17, 2025 5m

The Nuke Battery is credit-card sized, powers everything. Pop it in the wall slot, lights come on, fridge hums, Aunt Karen sighs through ceiling speakers. Beautiful. Efficient. Mildly…

S1E6 Agent Kelm - S1E06: Middle Life

Oct 17, 2025 3m

Everyone dies around forty. Too fat for the stairs, too bored to care. Aunt Karen schedules preservation pickup between 2 and 4 p.m. Couch to containment in three hours.Unless your brain is really…

S1E5 Agent Kelm - S1E05: The Box

Oct 16, 2025 2m

Let’s talk about the box. The EchoBox. Brain-only. Gel-filled. Cloud-connected. Smells like warm copper and bad decisions. No body, no skull, no hair, no sentimental attachments. Just the…

S1E4 Agent Kelm - S1E04: He’s Lying. He Is 460 Pounds.

Oct 16, 2025 4m

Kelm got promoted. Now he doesn’t clean racks—he goes inside the dreams.Nine-drip cocktail. Sleep-lock chamber. Neural sync. Full digital immersion. He hunts fragments—corrupted sequences,…

S1E3 Agent Kelm - S1E03: It All Goes Cold

Oct 16, 2025 4m

Kelm’s job title: Disconnect Specialist, Level 4. Corporate euphemism for “we don’t like to say murder.”He started in racks—physical maintenance. Steel shelves of humming EchoBoxes in closets and…

S1E2 Agent Kelm - S1E02: Family Archive in the Basement

Oct 16, 2025 4m

You want the system rundown? Fine. One more time, for the new hires.The EchoBox preserves the brain only—no bodies, too messy. Slosh them in GrayMatter™ nutrient gel, connect to the cloud, spin up a…

S1E1 Agent Kelm - S1E01: Meet Archibald Kelm

Oct 16, 2025 3m

Agent Kelm doesn’t kill people. He ends subscriptions.That’s his actual title on the EchoCorp pay grid: Disconnect Specialist, Level 4. Technically should be Level 6, but promotions require “positive…

Frequently Asked Questions

How many episodes does Agent Kelm - Season One: Cake Printer have?

Agent Kelm - Season One: Cake Printer has published 16 episodes since October 2025, covering topics in Fiction, Science Fiction.

Is Agent Kelm - Season One: Cake Printer still active?

Agent Kelm - Season One: Cake Printer is currently dormant with new episodes daily. Average episode length is 5m.

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