To Be Continued with Cristela Alonzo

EPISODE 40: I’M GOING TO BE HONEST. YOU DON’T REALLY KNOW ME.

After a long hiatus, I'm finally back with another episode where I decided to come clean about myself. I think people always think they know me but really, I keep a lot to myself. I chose to upload…

EPISODE 39: I'M NOT HIGH OR LOW...I'M MEDIUM MAINTENANCE

I'm back with a new episode where I thank my new (and old) supporters and talk about how being in the middle can be a great thing. Also, talk about mental health and how it affects me and how I treat…

EPISODE 38: I DON'T WANT TO GROW UP, I'M A TOYS 'R US KID (FINALLY)

This week I talk about my toy/retro video game haul that I got in San Jose while doing shows at the IMPROV with my friends Steve Halasz and Jerry Rocha and how buying old stuff can unlock moments…

EPISODE 37: LIKE WHAT YOU LIKE. EVERYONE ELSE SUCKS

I went to Wrestlemania 39 last week. Grew up a wrestling fan and had some people criticize it because "it isn't real." It made me realize how much people LOVE to judge things people might like…

EPISODE 36: TRYING TO DO VIDEO WITH MY PODCAST BECAUSE I'M ALWAYS YEARS BEHIND EVERYONE ELSE

This week, I talk about how it's been over a year since we last talked! Haha...the video of this podcast will be available on YouTube. I also talk about being tired and busy and what I've been up to.…

EPISODE 35: It's A Next Year! My List of Five Random Things That I Kind Of Remember From 2021

I just wanted to do a quick episode to say "It's The Next Year!" to everyone. I'm saying this instead of Happy New Year's because why give you the pressure of trying to be happy if you don't feel…

EPISODE 34: Merry Christmas! If I'm Wearing Pantyhose, I'm Robbing A Store

This episode was recorded on Christmas as a Christmas gift to all of my four listeners. In this episode I catch everyone up on where I've been and what my year has been like. It's had ups and downs…

EPISODE 33: Are You Sure You Can Afford That $12 Sports Bra

EPISODE 32: Why I Hustle in Silence And Let The Lamborghini Make The Noise...

This week, I talk about having a baby...my niece NOT me though I do like to eat for two but that's another story and seriously...can we make a Lego set of Los Bukis a real thing?

EPISODE 31: Do You Ever Ask Yourself If You're 'Enough?'

I finally made a new episode of my podcast and explain how the struggle I have with doing my podcast is the question that makes me wonder if I'm doing "enough" for people to want to listen. I always…

EPISODE 30: Should Birthdays During A Pandemic Count?

This week, my listeners realize I'm back after taking months hiatus to try to help save democracy. Did it work? We still don't know! Starting the year with a new podcast to catch people up. Also, for…

EPISODE 29: The Last Four Years Feel Like I Get A Daily Paper Cut And Touch Lemons

In this week's podcast, I talk about what projects I've been working on lately, my work with the Joe Biden campaign and why the Trump presidency feels like what the name of this episode is: The Last…

EPISODE 28: TGIF (Tias, Goya Is Fired) EVERYONE!

This week, I break down why the media is not "a virus" and how I love when I ask people to unfollow me because they support a racist. Also, I talk about the magic of Latino supermarkets and why our…

EPISODE 27: Stop The Spreading Of The Karenavirus

It's time we talk about the importance of wearing masks during a pandemic where people are dying....and how not wanting to wear one because it's about freedom is the dumbest thing I've heard. Go run…

EPISODE 26: How About A Jeffrey Dahmer Statue? He's Part Of Our History Too...

This week, I talk about breaking all of my four listeners' hearts last week when I DIDN'T podcast. Also, I talk about why we like to celebrate the worst parts of our history and pretend like those…

EPISODE 25: The Person That Knows Me Best...

This week, I introduce my best friend Steve to my four listeners. If you follow me on social media or have seen me on tour, then you know him. We got people from IG to have Steve ask me questions…

EPISODE 24: Black Lives Matter

In this week's episode, I talk about why I support the protests and talk a little about why it's important to support the movement and make sure you don't insert yourself into it. There's really…

EPISODE 23: I Was Depressed? I Just Thought I Was Poor

This week, I talk about my love of space and science, I break down my breakdown from 2018-2019 because it's Mental Health Awareness Month and the thing I'm into this week is money...YOUR money!

EPISODE 22: White People Should Stay Out of Haunted Houses

This week, I dive into why I LOVE scary movies but also what is wrong with them and talk about why I’m wearing workout clothes but not working out. Also, I talk about how I’m the kind of person that…

EPISODE 21: St. Vicks Vaporub - The Saint Of Healing On A Budget

This week, I break down low-budget health care and talk about what it was like translating action movies for my mom as a kid. Also, I list all the video game consoles/systems I have and talk about…